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SITE UNDER CONSTRUCTION - THANK YOU FOR YOUR PATIENCE, COLONIST
ABOUT US
Since before you can remember, NuCaloric® has been the #1 trusted nutrient distribution partner across Mars, the Belt, and beyond. Our mission is simple: eliminate the ancient burden of "eating" and replace it with something better. Faster. Cheaper. More efficient.
☆ FOOD. SOLVED. ☆
Whether you're a miner, a marine, or just a regular UESC employee trying to survive your shift, NuCaloric has a nutrient solution engineered exactly for you. No chewing required.*
*Chewing may still be required depending on product selected. NuCaloric is not liable for jaw fatigue.
OUR PRODUCTS
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NuCal Paste™ A completely balanced meal in convenient tube form. Comes in 4 flavors: Beige, Off-White, Grey, and "Mystery." |
Solvent Bars™ High-density nutrient bars designed to survive re-entry, vacuum exposure, and your little brother. |
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QuikSlurry™ Just add water (or don't). Now available in the break room dispenser nearest you. |
The Drinkable Cheeseburger™ Our #1 seller by volume. See below for details! |
★ FEATURED PRODUCT ★
THE DRINKABLE CHEESEBURGER™
Why eat a cheeseburger when you can DRINK one? NuCaloric's engineers spent over three fiscal quarters perfecting the ratio of beef-analog, cheese-analog, and bun-analog particulates suspended in a smooth, sippable emulsion. Comes in a resealable pouch built for zero-gravity consumption.
- 100% of the flavor, 30% of the chewing
- Approved for consumption during EVA (external activity waiver required)
- Now with 12% more "pickle notes"
- Ketchup and mustard swirls included at no extra charge
★ BUY 3 GET 1 FREE THIS CYCLE ONLY ★
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS
Q: Is NuCaloric food real food?
A: NuCaloric products meet or exceed all UESC nutritional minimums. "Real" is a matter of perspective.
Q: Why does the Drinkable Cheeseburger separate if left standing?
A: Shake well. This is normal. This is fine.
Q: Can I get a refund?
A: All sales are final per Section 12 of your employment nutrition contract.
MORE FLAVORS COMING SOON
SIGN OUR GUESTBOOK!
Let us know what deck you're stationed on and how much you love NuCaloric!
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